Hakim, you can't see what hat you're wearing in your inventory, if that's where you're looking.
The hat will still appear on your head though, if you have equipped it through !em. It just doesn't appear in your inventory.
As for the full servers, donators can write a connect-command in the console, but sadly I can't remember it.
But you can download this:
http://static.aprilon.net/tf/GameMenu.resIt's basicly just a new start menu for your TF2, where the 3 aprilon servers are added, so you can just click one of the servers, and you will automaticly join, and if you're a donator, you can get one of the reserved slots.
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=848Read this topic if you don't know how to install it.
Looking forward to seeing you on the server!